Thoughts on the Treadmill

First day in the gym in 2010. No iPhone or gym buddy to keep me company.

Lesgow. Stretch, stretch. Hop on to the treadmill.

Start. Speed, 2.0.  Nggrggrhh. Boring walk for one minute. Beep. Beep. Beep. Incline settings 5.5, speed 4.5. Now it’s getting interesting.

Two minutes later, cute chinito dude was doing some leg lifts at my left. Oyeh.

So what am I gonna have for lunch? Chinito boy.  Good idea. But seriously, salad?  Maybe. Gosh the music in this gym is killing me. Slimmer’s World had better music.  Maybe I should really get an mp3 player so I have something to use temporarily.  Anson’s is just right across the street.  I should check later.

Bush is so noisy. Haha. He’s already friends with the instructors.

Hey mister, please stop staring at my butt. What a fuckin’ perv.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Speed 6.0. It’s so good that I can brisk-walk and think of a lot of non-sense without worrying of bumping into someone or tripping over something.  Maybe this is why I love the treadmill.

I didn’t know that it was tough to sing and play Die Alone at the same time.  Must be my poor guitar skills. Haha.  I should stick to simpler tunes like Katy Perry’s Thinking of You.  Now, where the heck will I find the chords to The Duke Spirit’s Wooden Heart. That’s a very good song. Makes me sleep but also keeps me awake during long work hours.

Wow, I can see Mexicali from here. Mmm. Tacos, burritos, and grilled pork chops. Mmm. Yeah, I should have veggies for lunch. Darn it. I’ll make it up on cheat weekends then. Cheat.

Fifteen minutes later, I burned 69 calories. That’s how much calories there is in a shot of Patron Silver Tequila. And the thought of it makes me thirsty. Wait, I AM thirsty. Chinito boy comes back to do more leg lifts. What was I thinking again?  Nice legs, yessir. Bad Man’s World playing in my head. It’s a bad man’s world. It’s a bad man’s world.

Sweat is dripping from my back and my chest. Ten more minutes. I always make it a point to stay in the treadmill for at least 30 minutes. Walk, brisk-walk, run, brisk-walk, repeat. It’s a bad man’s world. It’s a bad man’s world. It’s a bad man’s world.  Will it be me or will it be you.

142 calories in 30 minutes.  Not good for day one. But what the heck. Time to hit the shower.